How to Bring an End to Gaslighting: Certainty of Shared Reasoning
[Note: I wrote this piece during the Trump presidency, and it’s now more relevant than ever. America has inexplicably allowed him to become president again.]
Gaslight: A Terrifying Fable that Sheds Light on Our Country’s Crisis
The word gaslight was transformed from a noun meaning “an illuminating gas burner” into a verb—meaning “psychological manipulation with the intent of making people question their memories, perception, or sanity.” This curious definition of gaslight as psychological abuse arose after the release of a popular play by the same name in 1938, and took its permanent place in the English lexicon after the 1944 release of the movie version, starring Ingrid Bergman as Paula Alquist, and Charles Boyer as Gregory Anton, the man she marries. Young and trusting, Paula is utterly ignorant of the fact that Gregory murdered her aunt Alice many years earlier — and in the very house in which the couple now lives. Set in 19th-century London, the disturbing story unwinds slowly, as Gregory puts his long con into motion.
It starts with nagging doubts about whether she is remembering things correctly. Paula’s uneasiness doesn’t subside, her apprehension and alarm growing increasingly over time. Gregory perpetually deceives her with falsehoods and trickery — hiding objects and telling her that she misplaced them; claiming she said things that she in fact did not say; angrily blaming her for things that didn’t actually happen; insisting she is tired or ill — layering lie upon lie upon lie, which drives her to confusion, exasperation, and exhaustion. Day by day, she watches her sanity slip away.
Gregory keeps Paula isolated most of the time so that she has no one to corroborate with, making it more and more difficult to sort out the truth. The one consistent detail she notices is the dimming of the gaslights at night, whenever he goes out. (He secretly returns through the back way, nightly carrying out his mischief. All this time, unbeknownst to Paula, Gregory has been systematically trying to locate her aunt Alice’s collection of precious jewels. Alice had thwarted his search for them, and he’d strangled her in the process.)
As we watch this nightmare unfold, Paula’s situation grows desperate. We wonder how she will ever escape her husband’s mad plot before he kills her, too. All seems lost. Yet thankfully, in the end, Paula discovers the truth, and Gregory is taken away by the authorities. But I’m getting ahead of myself.
The Abuser is the White House and the Victim is the American People
Today, the significance of Gaslight couldn’t be more obvious. Each of us must work daily to bolster our sanity against the unending onslaught of disinformation spewing from the White House and from the president’s shameless enablers trolling the Web.
It’s vital that we check, double-check, and triple-check anything we read or hear — considering the source before accepting or sharing it. And don’t indulge in gossip. Period.
Furthermore, we’ve got to pace ourselves. Don’t become overloaded by the continuous stream of lies and misinformation. The relentless deflections, misdirections, and distractions are meant to keep us confused, overwhelmed, and fatigued to the point of despair. But we don’t have to give in to the mentality of victimhood. As demoralizing as it appears, we’re not helpless to fight this avalanche of outrage.
Make it a habit to write things down — print out, or otherwise record facts in hard copy form — so that later when you come upon the opposite, you can go back and verify what you know is true. The administration’s mendacity is impossible to keep up with, but you can go back and check the daily tally anytime, and consult reliable sources for additional information. Again, pace yourself. Read in moderation.
The Way Out: Mind Your Precinct
You may be thinking that this advice sounds well and good, but maybe, like I do, you often feel as unequipped as ever. Every day, Mr. Trump brazenly doubles down, even committing treason on the world stage. We wonder if the president “would” or “wouldn’t”—until it almost feels like it doesn’t matter whether we care, whether we resist, or whether we vote. But that’s exactly what Gregory wants — er, I mean, what Donald and Vlad want — you to feel. Don’t give in!
Fortunately, the practical application of Gaslight is crystal clear. If you haven’t seen it, or even if you have, I urge you to watch this film again. Share it with as many people as you can. It’s a powerful parable which, I dare say, Jesus himself would tell us if he were here today. Gaslight the movie contains the very answer we need to save our democracy from peril: Our escape is right there in the way the tale itself is resolved.
Allow me to explain. Basically, Paula is rescued by a neighbor. A Good Samaritan is looking out for her: A man who works for Scotland Yard, Brian Cameron (Joseph Cotten), happens to see Paula with Gregory, suspects something is not quite right, and reopens the case of Alice Alquist’s murder; he also assigns a new constable to patrol her neighborhood. With the officer’s help, plus the participation of a neighbor across the square, eventually their investigation uncovers the truth, and Cameron is able to show Paula what’s really been happening.
So, the real answer to our national crisis is a spiritual one. Wherever we are, we can be like that ordinary constable, minding our precinct. Nineteenth-century spirituality pioneer Mary Baker Eddy instructs us to keep working out “the spiritual, which determines the outward and actual” (Science & Health, p. 254). No one’s negative thoughts, deceptions, or lies — no matter where they’re coming from, or how often — can stop you from knowing the truth. As Eddy puts it, “Evil thoughts, lusts, and malicious purposes cannot go forth, like wandering pollen, from one human mind to another, finding unsuspected lodgment, if virtue and truth build a strong defense.” (p. 234–235). We can build up this virtue-and-truth line of defense with a moment-by-moment habit of prayer.
Now, we’ve got to live it.
That means that it’s our sacred duty to be a good neighbor, and to “mind our precinct.” Keep an eye out for your neighbors. That’s not only the folks on your block, but also anyone you meet — in person, on the Internet, wherever you are. Simply pay attention to what comes into your experience, and react with prayer and good deeds.
In other words, turn to God (Love Itself) as your first resort. With God guiding you, you can bring healing in each situation, sometimes even without saying a word. Just do the right thing.
Our government’s gaslighting may feel impossible to combat. But it isn’t hopeless. Evil destroys itself. Truth wins.
When each one of us chooses to “mind our precinct” — living our prayers instead of just grousing and sighing over the world — we will transform our neighborhood, our town, our country, our world. As Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl said in Man’s Search for Meaning, “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” When Jesus was asked, “Who is my neighbor?” his answer was to tell the story of The Good Samaritan. The lesson? “Go, and do likewise.”
©2018 Janis Hunt Johnson and CS Renewal Ministries. All rights reserved.
I’m an interfaith advocate and spiritual activist. My goal is to teach, preach, and heal, following Jesus’ example. This piece is the 8th installment in my monthly Medium series, “Christian Science Redux.” If you like this article, please clap for it, and please subscribe, too! Learn more from my award-winning book — Five Smooth Stones: Our Power to Heal Without Medicine Through the Science of Prayer. My upcoming second book is tentatively titled Seven Words to Freedom, Eight Days a Week: The Healing Power of Living Prayer. Find out more here. I’m also on Goodreads, on Twitter @CSRenewal, and on Facebook. #LivingPrayer
